Keep on Truckin'

I've seen all 48 states but not everything in each state, so I'm still travelin'. And Miles - that's my husband; he still likes to travel too. We've been married since January, 1, 1912. We got married in New Mexico Territory - that means before it was a state. Miles was 18 an' I was a blushing bride of 16. I won't say my old coot's been driving a long time, but the first driving job he had, he yelled "Git up!" and "Whoa!" a lot of the time. Funny how fast them hay-burners seemed in those days.
Miles scared me here a while back. We'd pulled into a Rest Stop after the last delivery (empty trailer - you know, no place to go for a while), and I kinda wondered why we just sat for three days. He wouldn't talk to me - I figured either he was in one of his moods, or maybe he'd turned off his hearing aids again.
Well, we sat there and sat there and finally a State Trooper came by and banged on the cab door the third morning and asked, "Is everything okay in there?"
I rolled my window down and said, "Well, I guess it is -"
And the Trooper said, "Phew - what is that awful smell?"
And I thought, "Oh, oh - did Miles up and die behind the wheel, like he always said he was going to? I thought it was his socks."
So the Trooper called the Emergency Medical folks an' they came rushing out in a ambulance with the red lights whirring and siren screaming. They started working Miles over when they got him out of the cab. Miles came around. He started yelling, "That's enough, Nadine! Leave me alone! How many times a month do you want to get frisky, you nasty ol' woman?"
So that awful smell was Miles' socks after all.
You know what was funny? The Trooper made Miles take them socks off, and then he went an' SHOT those poor defenseless socks. Said it was the only decent way to put them out of their misery.
Guess I'd better get to movin' on. Oh, before I go, wanna hear some good gossip?
Seems Showtime and his fantastic Lady are gonna tie the knot. Hope they're happy, an' stay hitched at least as long as Miles and me. You know, I'd love to be a bridesmaid - they're gettin' married right on the air on Open Road Cafe, Trucker's Network at Sirius (Stream 138) - but what do you want to bet Miles won't get a load goin' anywhere near Dallas that day?
Left Lane's still out there drivin'; so's Robert Kuhle. I keep tellin' them boys they need to take it easy onct in a while, but they don't listen. I even offered to go along on some of their runs, just to keep 'em company, but they both turned a little pale - they're neither one gettin' any sun, that's obvious - an' said their dispatchers wouldn't let them take anyone along. Hmph. Mighty strict dispatchers.
Tony Mom got himself that fancy-shmancy truck what was on the back of the Motor Carriers Road Atlas for 2003. Real purty - wish Miles would spring for somethin' nice like that.
While you're on line lookin' around, check out HouseholdDrivers.com an' Driversmag.com. Good reading, and just for us truckers.
Guess I'd really better head out now. Miles is threatenin' to leave me here at the Diamond B - so I'll say 'bye for now, an' I'll see you behind the headlights someday. You-all drive safe now!
Nadine